“The sun is really hot. If I sit on the sun it will burn my booty.” – Ezra

Ezra, “can I have corn cheese?”
Me, “what are you talking about?”
Ezra, “you said corn cheese!”
Me, “oh I said no more cheese.”

Out of context Ezra, “I’m giving the chicks some weed.”

More out of context Ezra, “Daddy, daddy I’m gonna be your weed guy!”

Noah to Ezra, “I don’t want your attitude.”

Me, “boys can you help me pick up so I can vacuum?”
Ezra, “why? Is somebody coming over?”

Me: what did you boys talk about in Sunday school today?
Ezra: well me and garret were telling funny jokes in the bathroom
Me: okay what did your teachers talk about?
Ezra: I don’t know.

Ezra: Daddy, someone needs to chop these weeds and mow this grass
Me sarcastically: I know, who is in charge around here?
Ezra serious: I guess i have to everything around here

Me: Hey Boys, we need to paint the chicken coop today, can you help?
Ezra: Well, um… It sounds like a hard job, I’ll see what I can do. I may not be able to do all of it.

Ezra to me, “I’m gonna tell the chicks to stay away from our hammers and stuff so they don’t get hurt.”
Ezra to the chicks, “tweet tweet tweet tweet.”

“I have the hook-ups.” both boys say this when they have hiccups.

“My finger is all rumbly.” Ezra
“Rumbly?” Me
“yea the water did that.” Ezra
“Wrinkly!” Me

Ezra, “mommy I don’t know how to sleep.”
Me, “well you start by closing your eyes and mouth.”
Ezra, “but they keep popping open.”

“Duty calls!” – Firefighter Noah
“No, we say booty calls!” – Ezra

I was informed today that vanilla frosties are for when it’s sunny out and chocolate frosties are for when it’s REALLY sunny out and eyes water from the sun.

“Hey guys stop it! I’m trying to be difficult.” – Ezra talking to his toys

Ezra is flipping a coin and calling either rock or scissors.

Ezra, “we’re too young to go to garden school.”
Me after thinking for a bit, “do you mean kindergarden?”

Noah, “All that pizza made my tummy hurt.”
Me, “Pizza?”
Noah, “yea, pizza.”
Me, “We didn’t have pizza.”
Noah, “Oh.”

I told Noah to let me know if he needed help. Then I over hear Ezra, “I’ll help you as a tattletale!”

Ezra talking about the cats, “they are great at pooping and they are great sleeping.”

Noah, “There are two of Micah and Judah and there are two of us!”
Matt, “Yep, they are twins and you are twins.”
Noah (looking at me and Matt), “And you guys are twins!”

I was resting my eyes while the boys did something involving “beibers” and “damage.”
Turns out they were beavers building a dam.

Me, “What are you doing?”
Ezra, “I’m up to something.”

The boys’ phineas and ferb cd has a song called “my undead mummy and me.” The boys walk around singing “my dead mommy and me.”

“Say thank you Noah.” – Noah
“Thank you, Noah.” – Noah
Nope I didn’t accidentally leave Ezra out of the conversation. He wasn’t involved.

Chickens come from chicken trees – Noah.

Ezra is playing a new leapster game and the game said something about hitting targets, “mommy, the penguins went to Target!”

“Noah be careful I don’t know how to sing.” – Ezra to the tune of frosty the snowman.

“I ate baby Jesus and the hay!” out of context Ezra

Me: You are going to celebrate Jesus’ birthday tomorrow at school.
Ezra: Is baby Jesus going to be there?

“Super Noah wants some make-up.” – Super Noah

Ezra heard the term bundt cake yesterday for the first time and immediately asked, “mommy what’s butt cake?”

Matt, “who’s side are you on?”
Ezra, “Noah’s, he’s on the right.”

Ezra brought me baby Jesus in a cup and whispered, “shhh he’s a baby angel.”

“I’m having allergies I can’t put my own socks on!” – Ezra

“I like daddy, he is funny. I like when he shoots my butt. He shoots my butt every day.” – Noah (with a nerf gun of course)

“Jesus lives in my tummy and helps me do good things” – Ezra.

Noah: I’m going to high five your face.